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IM BAAACCCKKKK!!!!
my gosh, its been absolutely AGES since I've posted!!
so what have I been doing this whole time?? basically, in a nutshell I had major spinal surgery and am now recovering from it.
My family arrived from QLD on THursday the 4th November (the day be4 my surgery)and it was awesome to see them!!! A few little family feuds, but you gotta expect that. We all stayed at Casuarina lodge- which is accommodation for families of patients in Westmead hospital. I gorged myself at tea, knowing I wouldn't be eating for the next few days and sharona and I tried to figure out how to use the videocamera, cause she was going to film the surgery teh next day. I rang the hospital and they still didn't know what time my surgery was going to be. FRUSTRATING!! then we talked to the boys (casey & taylor for a little while, then went to bed.
The next morning, Friday, the big day I woke up early and had my medication and some breakfast at 5.30ish. Talked to Leith on the phone and we prayed together taht the surgery would go well. I had to be in hospital by 11, and so i had plenty of time to destress, and spend time wth my family, but somehow those few hours absolutely flew!!! we ended up being late to the hospital and i was all stressing out!!!
we had to wait in the waiting room (obviously!!) for a while, then I got called in to see one of the head nurses who filled out mountains of paperwork for my admission and gave me my hospital bands, TED stocking etc. then i was taken to a single room and told to change into paper undies and a hospital gown and hop into bed. then my family came and saw me & prayed with me. for some reason i was needing to go to the toilet like literally every 5 minutes- i think it was the nerves!!! then Mum, Dad and MOnica went to the caf to get some lunch while Sharona stayed with me. THey had barely been gone 5 minutes when teh wardsman came to take me to theatre and i was like nooooooooooooo!!!!! I want to see my family. So Sharona rang them and I got wheeled off to theatre admissions where my Mum & sister caight up with me and said their goodbyes. At teh very last minute they wer still trying to organise about taping the surgery as none of the nurses knew anything about it!!!! stressful!!! as tehy wheeled me away I was just staring at mum, Monica and Sharona and started crying cause I was sooo scared. Scared of dying and never seeing them, scared of the pain i would soon be experienceing and scared of being alone.
the wardsman wheeled me to the room outside the theatre where I waited alone for ages. Finally teh anaethetist came and started talking to me and out a cannula in my arm. Without even explaining what he was doing, he started injecting something into it......and thats all I remember.
teh next thing I knew I woke up with an oxygen mask on and a nurse standing at my bed. I asked her when the operation was going to start, and she told me it was all over. and i was out of it again. the next thing i remeber after that was my family & sharona standing at the end of my bed smiling, but looking sad & concerned. and then i was out of it again.
the next day i was surprisingly feeling okish, just very very drowsy and dopey. my family & Sharona came and saw me before they went to church and i spent the morning sleeping. apparently my O2 sats were very low, so i had to wear an oxygen mask the whole time. I also had an IV and catheter..how exciting!!! I waited impateiently in the afternoon to see my family again, but they didn't come. I kept asking the nrse if she'd seen them, but no. Finally around 5pm a herd of ppl- Sharona, Karina, Leonie, Leith, Jamie, Ashley, Kylie-Anne & Monica came and saw me and i was sooo happy to see them!! my room was so crowded as you're only supposed to have a maximum of 2 ppl in there at a time!!! they were all joking around and cheering me up tremendously and they brought me floweres, and cards and chocolate!!! then they had to go, which was sad. I don't remeber what else happened taht day.
I can't even remember what happened on sunday, apart from being in excruciating pain. I do remeber on sunday night being in absolute agony, the worst pain I've ever experienced. I buzzed the nurse and begged her for more morpheine but she got angry at me cause i'd had some just 1 hour ago, and couldn't have it for another 3 hrs. I had no concept of time, so how was i supposed to know and she was just really mean, even though i was crying and sobbing like a little kid she had no sympathy whatsoever and just left me without so much as a word of comfort. I was so upset, I literally wanted to die- to be put out of my misery. I messaged Sharona and Leith and their replies brought me comfort. I didn't sleep at all taht night.
Monday i was in a shockingly bad mood. my neighbours in the room with me were all cheerful and i just ignored them. I asked one nurse to roll me onto my side (and this procedure is ONLY to be done with at least 2 people helping to avoid twisting the spine- one at the shoulders and one at teh legs). All teh other nurses were at handover so she STUPIDLY tried to roll me herself. All she ended up doing was twisting my spine until i was in such horrible pain. When she realised she couldn't so it alone, she LEFT ME IN THAT POSITION and told me she'd be back. She never did come back. talk about shocking care parctices.
I refused my meals, so they fed me through IV fluids. (remember, i hadn't eaten since Friday morning). I was just laying there miserable when an old lady, Antoinette from the bed next to me came over. She had also had spinal surgery a few weeks ago. She was so nice to me and told me that I had to eat. she said I would die if I didn't and teh IV fluids were the only thing keeping me alive. SHe said "if you want to get out of this place you need to eat to get your strength up". I really didn't want to eat, and I couldn't even move to reach my tray, so she spoon fed me my cereal. I only managed to eat a few spoonfuls, but it was at that moment that changed my whole attaitude. her simple act of kindness gave me so much hope that from then on I ate more often and dtermined that I would be wealking as soon as possible. and I did. I got up and walked- very unsteadily, with 2 people holding me up, but i walked. I made it to about 4-5 metres and was exhausted!!!.
So the rest of teh week i will just describe in general. I had visitors everyday, and by teh end of teh week I had 6 bunches of flowers, a potplant, ballons, tons of cards and tons of chocolate. every person who saw teh end of my bed said "well, someone's loved!!". Even though my attitude had changed, i was still dependent for the next few days. I nearly blacked out every time they tried to shower me so they would have to dress me and put me back to bed before i fell on the floor, i had to walk with assistance, my bowels were blocked from all the morpheine and it took 6 days and 5 enemas (yes, i'm sure you wanted to know that!). I could only sit for periods up to 10 minutes. So the remaining few days were a blur of medication, friends visiting, saying goodbye to family, horrible horrible food and boredom. i watched tv a lot of teh time ($9 a day!) and talking to a favourite nurse of mine, Deb was a highlight. She was a 3rd year student nurse, and is my hero. Because she is teh only nurse there who cared. She took the time to sit down and talk with me and ask how i was feeling. SHe was such a joker, she made everything fun- even enema's!!! WHen I was discharged on teh Thursday, we both cried. I was supposed to be discharged on the friday, as my physiotherapist and occupational therapist were sure that I wasn't ready to go home yet, but it was a public hospital and they needed the beds so i was kicked out on thursday. Dear Vhonda picked me up and it was a painful, bumpy ride home- but it was WONDERFUL to be out of that horrible hospital in in my own room. i even got to bring back my oxygen mask as a souvenir!!!
A few days later Clover and I decided to walk over to the hospital. now for those of you who know, its not very far- probably 100m from the front of the res where i live. but it took us over an HOUR to go from my room, up the stairs and to the hospital!!! CLover had her wisdom teeeth out, so we were both in agony and looked quite a sight as we moadned and groaned. In teh end, i couldn't make it back to teh res as i was in pain and very tired so i came back in a wheelchair.
So the past 2 weeks since i got home have been rather boring. The highlights being- my 19th b'day, and visits from ppl from avonjail such as Taylor, Casey, Daniel and Leonie. other than taht, the main highlights of my day are- going over to boys dorm, and checking my mail!!! i spend a big chunk of my day staring at my bedroom ceiling, and watching movies on my laptop. My darling friends from avonjail sent me a care package teh other day with crossword puzzles, books, food, impossible puzzles (thanks casey!!) and a colouring in book!!! that really made my day!!! and the dean of women, dear Vhonda pops in and visits me every day to see how i'm doing!!! oooohhhh.....some ppl are just soooo sweet!!I get tired very very easily, and something as simple as washing my dishes can make me so exhausted i take a nap for a few hours!!!
I miss everyone terribly and wish i could see them again soon, but i guess it won't happen. Not this year anyway. but just letting you know taht I am feeling a lot better and thank-you all for your cards, presents, thoughts, prayers and visits...I appreciate them so much!!!
Ahh well, i actually have some more, terribly exciting news which happened yesterday, but my back is hurting from all the sitting, so I'll try to come back later and post it.
Have a great day everyone!!! Study hard & all that jazz........
:)
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